STOP ME IF YOU'VE HEARD THIS ONE BEFORE: Yet more proof that NASA's manned space program is more about PR than LEO:

In the meantime, female astronauts, Sally Ride included, had scorned the idea of a crew of all women as a publicity stunt, even though NASA officials insisted it would provide an opportunity to learn more about how women adapt to weightlessness.

An independent panel of medical experts concluded in 1999 that while more research was needed on women, it did not require an exclusively female crew.

Sadly, I can just imagine the deeply clueless discussions that must have taken place to arrive at the abortive mission suggestions for STS-107...picture a stereotypical Hollywood sitcom "pitch" meeting:

"Hmm, it's not going to Station, what do we do with it, what do we do...Okay, okay...I got it!"


"What?"


"Something big, something impressive..."


"What is it? Tell me!"


"A special mission, something....somethiiiing...with a special focus..."


"Go on, go on..."


"Ahhhh, a satellite...wiiiith...a camera! Yes! That's it! A camera satellite, used for...envirionmentalist wacko propaganda-- er, uh, no, no...I mean...'awareness raising'...yes, that's it: 'awareness raising'!"


"Uh-huh, pretty pictures, go on..."


"And it can be used tooooo...get VP Gore's name in the news--- er, uh, no, no...I mean...'show us the fragile beauty of our planet's delicate and unique ecosystem'...yeah, that's it! Plug the watermelon angle -- it's hella big with the kids these days!"


"Hmm. Nah, the Republican Congress will never go for it."


"Damn! Hmm...Wait, wait -- I know!"


"Yes?"


"A, a special...crew! Yes, that's it, a special crew! One which will capture the public's imagination, pull at the heartstrings!"


"Go on..."


"Lesseee...Yes! A shuttle mission...crewed by...Make-A-Wish participants!"


"That's a little distasteful, don't you think?"


"Errr, okay, right...hmm...Oh! Yes! Here it is, picture this: a boy-band in space!"


"The Russians are already planning that."


"Oh. Nuts. Hmm....Britney?"


"We'd never get her into a HUT."


"Oh. Right. Hm. Boy-bands, Britney, girls...girls...hey, how about an all-girl flight?!"


"Go on..."


"...All girls, maybe...Charlie's Angels-- no, no...I got it: The Powerpuff Girls! They're huge!"


"They're cartoons!"


"What?! Oh. Hmph. Well...do we have any female astronauts?"


"Huh? Well, of course we do!"


"(sigh) All right, all right...I guess they'll have to do.....Are any of them...witches...by chance...? 'Cause, you know, they're really big right now..."

"Space medicine"? Come on, does NASA really think we fell for that lame rationalization with John Glenn's flight? If a crew happens to be female, fine, no problem, but don't force the issue just for ratings.

Posted by T.L. James on January 13, 2003 07:25 PM